People can't take photos

Something that really GRINDS MY GEARS is the fact that I seem to be one of the only people in the world who is capable of taking photographs.  As you can see from my beautiful Eiffel Tower post below, my photographs are AMAZING.  Seriously though, I’m talking about this:

You see, this is how a photo SHOULD be taken.  Everyone’s entire bodies can be seen, and I have gone in as close as possible in order to do that.  I’m also good at making people laugh before photos and to move the fattest parts of their bodies (e.g. tops of arms) away from the camera so as to get the most flattering shot.  However, if I am in a group of people and ask someone to take a photo of us- this is what I get:

Or THIS:

I’m not a photographer; I know nothing about being artistic and dramatic, but I know how big the people should be relative to the entire photo. (Bear in mind I’m only talking about ‘people’ shots here; obviously if the person is MEANT to be tiny next to a beautiful landscape that is a different kettle of fish.)  I like my photo to be taken like this:

Or this if I want a close up of my head and chest area:

But I’ve been consistently met with people who think that this is the way to shoot an individual:

Or THIS:

Or bafflingly, THIS:

This bothers me because when someone else hands me their camera I make sure that they are perfectly framed in the shot.  I make sure that their head is not tilted upwards making their chins look obese, and I make sure that, if something is meant to be in the photo with them, that the thing is clearly in view.  I feel like a absolute bitch when I want a photo taken as I have to ask people to take it again and AGAIN according to my wishes; things which, to me, seem blatantly obvious.  Perhaps I was just born with a gift of being able to take wicked killer photos, but I look upon this gift as a CURSE.   

Such a first world problem.